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Barbara Grajski's avatar

This FB post really touched and inspired me, too - heck, you might even have seen it when I shared it - but it doesn't matter; it's a good story to share, wherever it came from. I like your subtitle of its being a parable because that's exactly what it is. The lesson is what is important, whether it's a story or a fact, as you pointed out in Patrick Conroy's quote from "Beach Music." I am putting a Post-It on my computer screen and my bathroom mirror that says "Bus Driver" and want to keep that in the forefront of my mind.

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Hal Grotevant's avatar

Hi Barbara, Maybe I had seen it before?? I don't recall it, but sometimes I think things like this stick with us subconsciously. Some of these FB memes and stories do seem to make the rounds, but that lends kind of a timeless quality to them. I totally agree that, like a good parable, it's the lesson that counts. I love the post-it note idea!!! May we all be good bus drivers!

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Jane Newell's avatar

What a beautiful image of the impact each one of us can make in the world, especially at this time in US history. It is a way of life I've chosen, as best I can, to intentionally act in ways that may lighten a load, brighten a moment, or even - in silence - share the journey. Thanks for being that kind of person too, Hal. Your kindness and care for humanity has always been shining bright.

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Hal Grotevant's avatar

Dear Jane, Thank you so much. I see you doing that, too, and it's wonderful to behold. Anything we can do to support one another is so important, especially now.

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Jane Newell's avatar

Hal, BTW, my bus is filling up! I have 4 grandchildren living with me. Their mother became dispaced & I invited the kifs to temporarily be with me. It''s now 7 months🥰

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Hal Grotevant's avatar

Yikes!!! You're managing a multi-generational household!!! If anyone can do it, you can!

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Jane Newell's avatar

Agreed❤️

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Rhonda's avatar

I’ve been curious for some time about the purpose of ritual. The bus driver’s spontaneous story reminds me of the ritual of Celtic sin-eaters who “consume” a meal of the sins of the recently deceased. The sin-eater transforms the perception of the deceased in an act of suspended disbelief. It seems to me that to be the bus driver or sin-eater calls for an individual to break through the veil of separateness and take a risk—a powerful and unnerving thought. Hope I’m not running too far afield with this riff, Hal.

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Hal Grotevant's avatar

Dear Rhonda, I love these connections you are making! The sin-eater (a new one to me) is such a powerful image. Perhaps people like therapists and confessors serve some of that function in our world -- people can unburden themselves to someone else, who can serve that function of disposing of it in the Hudson, or consuming the sin, or administering absolution. Interesting to think how each of these relational roles involves another person who can be "neutral" -- bearing witness to the person and their burdens while not becoming personally burdened by or consumed by them. Fascinating... It makes me want to go back and re-read Joseph Campbell's Power of Myth, to see if these ideas are represented in there. You're so right that these require taking the risk to step out of separateness.

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Rhonda's avatar

Yes! I was thinking Joseph Campbell or David Whyte may have addressed these topics. I’ll have to investigate the sin-eater role further. Thinking it may be a self sacrifice similar to Christ. Thanks for your great and thoughtful reply.

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Hal Grotevant's avatar

I'm doing David Whyte's Three-Sunday series this month on "A Matter of Life and Death." Will listen carefully tomorrow to see if he touches on this. Let me know if you learn more about the sin-eater. Fascinating.

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Rhonda's avatar

What I am finding in my reading is that poor families in England and Wales in the 17th century would seek out a sin-eater when a death occurred as an affordable option to avoid the Catholic Church and indulgences. The sin-eater was looked down on as it was usually someone whose own sins could not be forgiven. (Their fate was already sealed.) The eating of sins was considered cumulative, so sin-eaters often lived in isolation. When performing the ritual, they would enter the room to find the body with bread on the chest and ale. Bread was thought to absorb sins. After sitting next to the body and eating the bread and drinking ale, the sin-eater would tell the family when the ritual was complete. The deceased would then not be doomed to purgatory and could ascend to heaven.

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Barbara Grajski's avatar

I wasn't interpreting the bus driver as being a sin-eater but rather a positive force for people to let go of their burdens. Perhaps I'm being too literal about the definition of a sin-eater.

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Rhonda's avatar

The sin-eater comparison didn’t hold up once I read more about it. Was just sharing what I learned about it.

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Jane Newell's avatar

Thsnks, Hal🥰

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